A Noisy Singaporean

14th July. Bastille Day. On being Ver 38 and What is my Dream?

I started the week reading Surah Al Baqarah from ayat 165 onwards. This morning ayat 171  and 172 stuck to me light a bolt. Interestingly there are parallels about what was to happen later in the day with this ayat. Did I tell you that today 14th July 2010, I turned 38?

(2:171) And so the parable of those who are bent on denying the truth is that of the beast, which, which has the shepherd's  cry and hears in it nothing but the sound of a voice and a call. Deaf are they and dumb and blind, for they do not use their reason.

(2:172) O you who have attained to faith. Partake of the good things which we have provided for you as sustenance, and render thanks unto God, if it is [truly] Him that you worship

Did I say that before subuh, I managed to do my early morning run around NUS? pass biz ad, Arts Fac, towards Engine Bridge, downslope towards Fong Seng and turned into Seven Eleven into the road where I live. Timing was 19 minutes plus (not my best but managed to work some sweat though). Later I did some flexibility exercises after the run with my elastic tension rope. Once over with my standard leg raises and push-ups, I was drenching with sweat. This is the reason why I wake up at 4 am and run. To have sweat oozing but the cool morning wind and silence blowing on me, to feel really hungry and with all my muscles taut and warm blood surging in term. I can feel the endorphines and adrenaline surging  in me. No words to describe the satisfaction of being able to push your own personal limits and boundaries. It simply feels awesome. Makes me feel I can take on any challenge, any problems  head-on. By 4:59am I had showered and sat on my prayer rug reading 2:163-176, with the proper enuciation of the Arabic makhraj and tarnum. (rhythm)

Lines 171-172 were significant to me that day, for "Allah has allowed me to Partake of the good things which he has provided for as sustenance." This is important for it is he who as not only given me sustenance but so much more. I received and is receiving the grace of our Lord everyday, but this morning I made time stand still and reflect of the many blessings that I have received for the past 38 years. The first in of course. I am alive. I had lived past 37. 

I had once read in a Los Angeles based online newspaper report the other day and was struck with one webpage that displays photos of US serviceman and servicewomen who perished in the service of their nation in operations in Iraq and Afghanistan. These servicemen, about 540 plus of them hailed from parts of Los Angeles. What struck to me most are youth and their age. Almost all are below 25. Young and in their prime. Their photos, not accompanied by any text shows an image of a proud soldier doing his or her duty for the defense of their country and paying the ultimate sacrifice for that belief - their life. The testimonials and message left behind by their loved ones were especially poignant. They spoke of not how they died, they spoke not in voices of anger, but they spoke of the many wonderful things the fallen had done that had special meaning to them, not of heroics but of mundane stuff, and also through their words they made it clear what the loss of their husband, son, daughter and friend had meant to them. This resonated deeply in me for if I die, and I will one day. I would want people to  know me truly for the values that I have set for myself, and how I had succeeded in  achieving them and  and also how hard I tried in achieving some goals that I had fallen short of achieving and how they can take the lessons in the many mistakes that I had made, to be better than me. For this to happen I need a certain amount of time to achieve them and blessed with being 38, means I had more time to make a difference in the lives of others. I thank Allah for giving me health, energy, wisdom, people whom I loved, people who love me, spiritual awareness of how small I am relative to the vastness of space and time, a desire to improve myself in understanding God's final revelation - the Quran, to be given an opportunity to be a 'Khalifah' (steward) in this journey of life and demonstrate that a true Muslim loves, cherishes and gives back as much as he has been given unto. شكر الحمد لله.

In the same breath, I thanked God Al - Mighty, for making me a Singaporean, and for having tossed me here in this part of the world, instead of Hebron, Gaza, Bukina Faso or even Paris..(no offense to those great cities!) . But I thank my lucky stars that my grandparents eloped from India and set sail here about 150 years ago and this made it posible for me to benefit from the best of what Singapore has to offer. It allows me to firstly have an education that not only rewards achievement but strengthens mind and character in such a way that I dont get lost when I am in Seoul, Massachusetts, or even Jakarta. Malcolm Gladwell, complimented Singaporeans by saying that we are one of the world's best in 'dealing with unpredictability' and looking backwards in my life, I can see why we become such a people. This is the gift of Singapore for SIngaporeans. Being in SIngapore, born to parents who places a premium in education, me and Bi got the best of the madrasah and secular education system. I teach. Bi practices medicine. Only in Singapore and few other places in the world such an event could and had happened. I thanked my lucky stars that morning to have met Faiz, started a family, bought a fine house, have good neighbours and having been allowed to serve in the defence of our nation. Of all my prized possessions, a picture of me in my passing out parade in SAF No.4 deserves special mention.

I am what I am today and specifically that being I ca relate to Singapore from all walks of life because of my National Service experience. I am proud to say that I served in a combat vocation. And for who for having served in an infantry battalion in the SAF, for having 'chiong' ed' up and down Peng Kang, Bajau,E-shaped knoll, Tekong, Botak and  Elephant Hill and knowing the difference between the sound made by a 5.56mm and 7.62mm rifle and having been given the experience close up to see men of action coming together to serve their country gives me a powerful sense of centered-ness. Despite the cacophony of colour and creed only one colour stood out; camouflaged green. And if you look closely, those tiny pixels in my 1991 ITD Pass Out Parade with Foxtrot Company,taken  in Infantry Training Depot, Pulau Tekong a dark skinned short haired skinny soldier with the name PTE Kamaludin Bahadin stands out. That was me, when I was 18. Today I have doubled in age, but never  have felt a year older. If ever, Singapore has given me what it possibly could and this allowed to be to give back to those who matters to me, in ways that I can. A big part of that comes from being able to teach Singapore's future - the young people of this country.

The second point that makes me proud to be a SIngaporean, is that I am a Muslim. Singapore protects our way of life and ensures that our women and daughters can wear their veils with heads held high. Lots of advertisement billboard in the Civil Service of women wearing head-dress, reaffirms  my belief in that we can be both excellent Muslims and patriotic Singaporeans and the two are not in conflict with each other. In fact I can be the best Muslim that I want and not worry about public perception or official biases. Part of this remains that Singapore Muslims though a minority are a shining example as compared to many parts of the world where Muslims are the majority. Ironically in those areas where the government is run by fellow Muslims, they often fall short of meeting the expectations of their citizens of fellow Muslims. Singaporean Muslims are excellent in many aspects and I believe like the generation before us we exemplify the best of our prophet's teachings (pbuh). For we believe strongly in the teaching of Al Sunnah Wal Jammaah, who are tolerant of people of different faiths and who treats their neighbours with dignity and respect even if they share a different religion, who allows their women to be educated and are rationale and progressive in outlook. The sense of Ummah of being a Singapore Muslim has never been stronger. The minarets of our;beautiful mosques piercing the sky and adorning our island as compared to the sad state of mosques that I saw in Paris,and the mood of Islam-ophobia rising in Europe makes me feel blessed to be here. Here I can prepare myself and my family dunia (present world) and akhirah (the next world) to the best of my ability. For this I am really thankful. 

I received three beautiful cards this morning from Dada, Nana and Rayn. Rayn's card was once written by Dada but is still significant. His wobbly, crooked, jerky way of writing alphabets suggests an image in my mind of his sister holding his small hand and writing out the words with him on paper was making me smile. Dada's card was extremely meaningful for she spoke from her heart with deep affection of what my presence had meant to her. Nana's card was an anagram that had computer QWERTY's keypad with some letters shaded, which with the help of Glenn Sim, I managed to decipher what it means. It says I love you from an iPhone keypad. Mother called me and said a prayer to me. When I sent Rayn she was there, put sugar in my mouth to sweeten my day and gave me a card from Father. Father called and wished me a happy birthday. Bi called and said how much I meant to her and to promise to have a great day. If wealth can be defined not in monetary terms but in the quality of relationship one has with one's loved ones, then I was a billionaire that morning. I explained my thanks to the Almighty for not just the sustenance but the above and beyond that he was blessed to me.

I drove off to school and as usual, today is going to be a long day. But it will be a special long one. I was happy. I played Zein Bhikka on the stereo. It was surreal.

 The first greeting of the day came from my DHS Globalisation Challenge students, who saw me in the morning  and wished me personally a happy birthday. I told them that the best gifts to me are not physical but the ones made up from effort and hard work. I told them that their gift to me will be presented on the 17th July, on  their competition date and whatever the result is, in my eyes they have won with their hard work and determination.

The next 3 hours was frantic but in true Kamal style a highly charged, photo-neutronic event, I am conducting a workshop. I dunno, but I always enjoyed delivering infront of a large crowd. I never feel afraid (of course I will if I am not well prepared) But with 6 weeks of preparation behind me, how can I mess up? I conducted a Skillful teacher workshop for 110 teachers along with my two senior teachers. It was perfect in execution. Initial feedback form teachers were positive. Later in the hour I has a lesson observation by my Principal along with VVIPs, VP and other teachers. That two was a highly charged moment. I wasn't doing anything impressive and 'above and beyond'. I told myself that the lesson would be me in action, RAW, Acoustic version. But it was fun showcasing what history teaching or social studies is about to people who are going to make important decisions for our country. Once that was over, I slumped in my seat. Took a deep breath and responded toa flurry of SMSes form my relatives and friends....Next up was going to 4/1

4/1 sang a birthday song to me as I walked into the class. After their singing I thanked them and told them the story of 14th July. I explained that 14th July also happens to be known as Bastille day. For on this day the French people in 1789 stormed the prison-fortress Bastille and bought an end to their cruel monarchy led by Louis XVI. I explained that this storming is not significant by itself but it unleash the power of the French people to bring an end to their absolute monarchy and establish the first modern nation states founded upon the principles of Liberty, Fraternity and Egalitaire. I tred to mention the French terms as best I could and added that the ideals were so powerful that it spawned not  only a social revolution in France but also  a political revolution in Europe itself. The French high on their newly found freedoms and committed to freeing the rest of Europe from their perceived yoke of tyranny of their monarchs and led by one of the greatest military general of all time Napoleon Bonaparte, conquered almost the entire Europe, sans Moscow and United Kingdom. I ended my saying that this day is special as it reminds us of the power of the people and how governments serve people and that if reforms were not made from above, one cab expect a revolution from below. Viva Le France.

What makes today a great day is 4/4 and what they did for me. Let me explain, when I started the year the class was new. They were in a despondent mood. A few I believed had given up on the subject. Many had issues with themselves and also me. Many were the introverted skeptical sort who would'nt participate. But today things changed. The worst of the Sec 4E's proved in my heart to be the best, more than I can imagined. Though I did not have a class with them, they told me to meet up with them in the canteen at 2pm. As busy as I was, I wanted to say NO, so along with my NIE trainee whom I was having a conversation we went down to the canteed. Firdaus took a picture and I knew a surprise is coming. True, there it was in the canteen a chocolate cake with smiling 4/4 students around it. I also got a green Vivezuela. I made a speech, Say thank you to all. But a point has to be made here; that is it takes a lot for a group of students to come around and buy and bring a cake to school, keep it somewhere for the entire day, surprise their teacher during their precious break and genuinely are happy doing it. It is for surprises like this that I had remained in teaching. I tried my best to speak to everyone and thanked every one who came. I was later presented with a  big birthday card. It had many Post-Its by many students on them. Below are samples of what they wrote (click on it and it will enlarge). I enjoyed the chocolate cake and told everyone that I sincerely wish and hope 

  that they will achieve spectacular results in the O Level results, have a good character and give back to society whatever they have been given. i told them, like t hem I was a version 16 of myself at that age. With many many birthdays and through learning from the many mistakes and being wiser as a result of the numerous feedback I received, I stand in front of them as a Version 38 of myself. I add a reminder that this is only a version, the best is yet to be. Amidst the eating, laughter, over a chocolate cake Rui Ting asked me a profound question "Mr K what is your dream?" I smiled. I told her "This is it!" She looked puzzled. I explained. "Rui Ting, you are not going to believe it if I tell you that I am one of those rare people in this world who are living their dream right now. I have a house (though not the biggest) an SUV (though not the best), a great family, a fantabulous working environment, great colleagues and Andersonians who often energize me when I need energizing and for them I spend most of my days, even more so than my family during term time. At the end of each day, as always I feel tired but contented of having touch lives, making an impact and imparting a little  bit of what I know to their collective wisdoms. I am lord of the classroom, king of the assembly hall, wise Jedi Master, the feared Assassin Creed and Flash all roll in one. I feel excited about every single day coming to school", I replied . Isn't that a dream for many others? For it is not money or fame that nourishes my soul but it is something else for me. William Blake says it best in the Auguries of Innocence, when he said;

"To see a world in a grain of sand, 
 And a heaven in a wild flower,
 Hold infinity in the palm of your hand,
 And eternity in an hour"

Short of sounding like an MOE advertisement, today I felt that in the midst of my students sharing in their laughters and hope for the O levels a sense of serenity and tranquility in being able to freeze time and enjoy the moment. A moment forged in genuine sincerity and devotion. Once can never experience this unless one has touched lives, and touched it meaningfully. So my dream has been fulfilled. The challenge now is scale even a higher peak with regards to being a teacher, a father, a husband a son and a friend. I have to scan the terrain and pick out a new peak.

I am not sure if Rui Ting, believed in my answer, but I do know an intelligent individual like her, will one day find out exactly what I meant by those words. Back in my HOD room, two presents sat on my table. One was a gift and present from my neighbouring HOD. I read it and I read it twice. Indescribable. No colleague has ever written a card that makes me feel as validated as a friend and as a true professional that day. I got a cat in a box by another head. Rayn lots of fun using it as a piggy bank. My boss SMSed me from (I really dont know from where she was at that time) and said "Happy Birthday to a Skillful teacher". The best present came last, really late. It cam about a week after my birthday. For the very first time in my teaching career as a Head of Department, my teachers rallied and wrote me a card. They wrote from the heart and I felt jubilant. The card is below. I ended my day with dinner at home, prayers and checking my facebook. I almost passed out. 186 entries from present students, ex students, cousins, nephews, ex JC classmates, Army mates, ex Gan Eng Seng classmate, colleagues, friends from overseas, and many more...all wishing me a great  "Happy Birthday". 186!!! Wow that must be a facebook record for a teacher or anyone. To me it is. A thought, a concern shared, a word of thanks means so much and goes so far deep inside. It is the every fuel that ignites me to to do what I can for one and all.

Its been a blessed day, 14th July this day. Version 38 shutdowned at 11.15pm. Tired but happy and praise to Allah for his blessings, gifts and for surrounding me with niqmat of people who truly cares about me. I will try my best not to disappoint anyone for as long as I live. Insyaallah i will!

Picture on the left is me in action at Universal Studios. Faiz surprised me with a trip to Resorts World Sentosa as a birthday present. It was a fantabulous day. I enjoyed every single part of it. I got myself an Indiana Jones hat, wore my vacation shirt and with everyone onboard we had a great evening. Thanks Mama for a great gift!

Another pose here with the entire family. Behind is a circa 1960s US Police Car. The entire place gives a feel of Hollywood and glitzy Americana. I enjoyed it. Even with the battlestar galactica ride being down.

Farihah and Rizman joined us in the trip. It was fun for all. He helped me with the full family shots.  

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No. 7 and boy was she proud!!

I remembered how excited she was when she brought home her hockey jersey home. She is going to play a match against opponents from school. I promised I will be there for the match. 

She told me that she plays the role of a midfielder. I haven't seen her in action on the pitch when she is in Pr 4, but I reckon she has improved tremendously. She trains thrice a week. She has a golden honey tanned and Faiz says her biceps are sculpted and firm now.

She is confident and takes the upcoming game in her stride. What the smile is about I guess, is her first real opportunity to wear her school name behind her back and do her school proud.

I reminded her that the number is special. In football it is meant for great players. Not quite sure if hockey has the same tradition. But one thing for sure, she is no easy walkover on the field.This is one tough cookie, just like her mommy so strikers from the opposing team, you just want to watch out for no. 7 from Radin Mas Primary. Go Dada!

Watch my princess on her suave board

Yes the holidays are here. I love the feeling when I can bring all to West Coast Park. here dada is showing off her newfound skills in balancing on her suaveboard. I took this pic cos she did not realise that her suaveboard has lights that glow. So here it is. (Boy she is growing up so fast!!)

Relaxing: Our Way

 

I really love this picture of everyone chilling out at our patio in the evening. I always love it when I can come home before dark and spend evenings before maghrib on our wooden patio. I love the way warm chengal wood in the cool evening breeze feels as my feet walks over them. This entire patio is conceived after reading lots of magazines of Australian townhouses that has lovely patios. Faiz and me bought the idea into out house in Neo Pee Teck. The physical warmth is enhanced further seeing all the warm smiles of Fir, Dada, Rayn and Faiz and me chilling out, doing absolutely nothing but smiling. We love our house. Alhamdulillah

Me and my Princess

Today we started our 'evening out' day. It is a day when I will go out with my princess, all by myself!. She has the choice of where to go but there is one rule; what and where we go remains a secret. She cannot tell it to anyone. (I fear that there will be comparisons if I ever have 'out days' with her other siblings)

So we headed to town at 5.35 pm and came back at 11pm. We had dinner at Puncak. (her choice, pic above is her eating her noodle), but she did not enjoy her oyster sauce chicken noodle as she felt it tasted 'different'. We did some secret things (cannot say cos its secret, but nothing illegal, safe to say that Sunday is Mother's Day)

By the end of the day I got her two gifts; a Taylor Swift platinum CD and a Little Miss Sunshine T-shirt from a pushcart vendor outside Isetan Orchard. We had ice cream, saw street buskers performing and contributed to their pockets, ran some errands, ran through underpasses and boy was she tired by 8pm!. For the most part I was happy.

The highlight of the evening, was when she spoke. I never heard her voice the way she truly sounds; without her brothers. She has been in the shadow far too long. But last night I saw her with her, putting on her pearlie white smile, her neatly coifed long hair, her well matched pants and brown crocs and I saw my little girl in a whole new light. She has grown right under my nose!!. (I can imagine it would be mascara, lipstick and perfume in a few years time). Listening to her that evening, seeing her move and looking into her eyes I saw my Dada for who she is. Sparks of her mother ran inside her. Strangely, through her I saw the world in a whole new different light through her. All the toil and sweat at work somewhat makes more sense.

I also realised that my girl has grown up, not in a physical way but in an emotional way. She is too embarassed to hold my hands. *sigh!* I guess thats a sign of things to come. But regardless of how old she is, she will always be my dot, my little one, my dada and she is uniquely herself. She has her own star and a great future with infinite possibilities. Through her my journey never ends. And when the end comes, I want her to know how important she has been to me. As much as I made a difference to her life, she did the same and more for me.

There are two Raudhahs in my life. One who is growing up quickly and the second in holy city of Medina. Both are as important. Both complete me in ways that I never could. One is here, now in the present the other is quite a distant away but never far from my d'oa. Insyallah, I will get to the distant Raudhah in my lifetime. But to this small Raudhah, I feel the world is a better place already!

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Are Muslims not allowed to take Jews and Christians as their friends?

CNN Article on what a certain American Muslim believes of Surah Maeida ayat (5:51) on Muslims not being allowed to take Jews and Christians as Friends.  

(click the above to see full CNN article)

Below is a reply from a famous ulama in Trinidad Shaykh Imam Hussein. This is his reply to ayat (5:51) delivered in a lecture. May it be of use to you and all our Jewish and Christian friends, neighbours, colleagues whom we cherish as much as our Muslim brothers and sisters.

"O YOU who have attained to faith! Do not take the Jews and the Christians for your allies: they are but allies of one another and whoever of you allies himself with them becomes, verily, one of them; behold, God does not guide people who are unjust. (Quran 5:51)"

There are several renderings for this verse, some interpret the part “your allies” as “friends and protectors”:

“O ye who believe! take not the Jews and the Christians for your friends and protectors: They are but friends and protectors to each other. And he amongst you that turns to them (for friendship) is of them. Verily Allah guideth not a people unjust.”

In reality, both renderings are problematic as they fail to translate correctly the message of the Qur’an as revealed in Arabic. When analysing the Qur’an, we do not just take one verse about a subject in order to derive from it understanding. We must analyse the message in its entirety. 

So, is Surah 5 of the Qur’an referring to all Jews and all Christians? Is it referring to these Jews and Christians too?:

Of the people of Moses there is a section who guide and do justice in the light of truth. (Quran 7:159)

Verily, those who have attained to faith [in this divine writ], as well as those who follow the Jewish faith, and the Christians, and the Sabians - all who believe in God and the Last Day and do righteous deeds-shall have their reward with their Sustainer; and no fear need they have, and neither shall they grieve. (Quran 2:62)

Not all of them are alike: Of the People of the Book are a portion that stand (For the right): They rehearse the Signs of God all night long, and they prostrate themselves in adoration. They believe in God and the Last Day; they enjoin what is right, and forbid what is wrong; and they hasten (in emulation) in (all) good works: They are in the ranks of the righteous. (Quran 3:113-114)

And there are, certainly, among the People of the Book, those who believe in God, in the revelation to you, and in the revelation to them, bowing in humility to God. They will not sell the Signs of God for a miserable gain! For them is a reward with their Lord, and God is swift in account. (Quran 3:199)

These 4 sections from the Qur’an (2:62, 3:113-114, 3:199, 7:159) all speak of Jews, Christians and indeed people of other faiths in a very good light. Add to that the fact that a Muslim man can marry a Jewish lady, or a Christian Lady. 

To interpret therefore, surah 5:51 of the Qur’an, to mean that we as Muslims cannot befriend all Jews and all Christians, in the light of the evidences presented, is incorrect. The ayah, when analysed in Arabic, tells us that there is a specific category of Jews and Christians with whom friendly ties and alliances, is strictly forbidden – and this is where a great miracle of the Qur’an is prevalent.

When analysed in Arabic, ayah 5:51 of the Quran qualifies and outlines the category from amongst the Jews and Christians with whom it has been made Haraam for Muslims to form alliances – and they are “such Jews and Such Christians who are allies of one another”.

Throughout history, the Jews and the Christians have been at loggerheads, especially during the era of Qur’anic revelation. The Jews accused Hazrat Mary of being unchaste (nauzabullah) and the Christians accused the Jews of killing Jesus (upon him be peace) himself. 

The hatred between the Jews and the Christians was so prevalent, that upon the Christian conquest of Muslim Spain, the Christians issued a decree (Alhambra decree) demanding the expulsion of Jews from Christian territories. 

For the Qur’an therefore, to predict a time where the Jews and Christians would form alliances is truly remarkable. The Christian-Zionist and Jewish-Zionist movements are a recent phenomena, and we as Muslims are forbidden to form alliances with such Jews and Such Christians.

The Qur’an sums it up in the following verse:

God only forbids you to turn in friendship towards such as fight against you because of [your] faith, and drive you forth from your homelands, or aid [others] in driving you forth: and as for those [from among you] who turn towards them in friendship; it is they, they who are truly wrongdoers! (Quran 60:9)

We as Muslims can never be friends with, for example, Israel. we are one ummah. 

However, we can befriend those who do not oppress the Muslims:

As for such [of the unbelievers] as do not fight against you on account of [your] faith, and neither drive you forth from your homelands, God does not forbid you to show them kindness and to behave towards them with full equity: for, verily, God loves those who act equitably. (Quran 60:8)

Ok, so allow me (Kamal) to conclude: 

1) Understanding Arabic is important for us to truly understand the subtle nuances in grammar, syntax and the use of the language to really understand its message and who actually is being referred to in the nouns as expounded in the Quran.

2) Understanding the Quran in its entirety and not take any verse out of context.
We need to firmly grasp the meaning, context, period of time the ayah was delivered to our prophet, pre-existing Arabian's socio-poltico, cultural makeup from 670AD onwards till the last date of the divine revelations as revealed to our prophet, and juxtaposing all of that to our own awareness of our faith, 'ilm' that we have and not jump to literal conclusions. Or to believe in any one ustaz or ustazah (taqsub), but to search for the truth for only the truth will set all of us free.

3) In the tradition of interpretation of the Quran, verses are interlinked and has to be cross-referenced to check upon for its consistencies. If 5:51 is polar opposite to other ayahs (2:62, 3:113-114, 3:199, 7:159) and even more ayahs that speak well of the people of the book (Jews and Christians), how can we logically accept the literal translation? The truth then is embedded in the Arabic syntax and through the millenia, great ulamas have given very good interpretation of this ayah and they all stress upon peaceful coexistence and the responsibility of Muslim rulers to their non Muslim subjects.

4) Last and not least, we are the 'khairatti ummati" and divinely protected and sent to this earth to do good and to be a shining example to others. In the tradition of our blessed prophet, we need to carry out this duty religiously and consciously. Unlike those who hijacked our faith to serve their political ends and choose a path of not only self destruction but tarnishing the image of our ummah, I do hope they find their peace. For me and many others like me, thinking, behaving responsibly and looking at the future optimistically for my family and deepening my understanding of Islam and Arabic is a lifelong quest. Allow me to end with one of my favourite ayah in the Quran (2:285-286). I read this every morning during subh with faiz and our kids as our supplications;

غُفۡرَانَكَ رَبَّنَا وَإِلَيۡكَ ٱلۡمَصِيرُ (٢٨٥) لَا يُكَلِّفُ ٱللَّهُ نَفۡسًا إِلَّا وُسۡعَهَاۚ لَهَا مَا كَسَبَتۡ وَعَلَيۡہَا مَا ٱكۡتَسَبَتۡۗ رَبَّنَا لَا تُؤَاخِذۡنَآ إِن نَّسِينَآ أَوۡ أَخۡطَأۡنَاۚ رَبَّنَا وَلَا تَحۡمِلۡ عَلَيۡنَآ إِصۡرً۬ا كَمَا حَمَلۡتَهُ ۥ عَلَى ٱلَّذِينَ مِن قَبۡلِنَاۚ رَبَّنَا وَلَا تُحَمِّلۡنَا مَا لَا طَاقَةَ لَنَا بِهِۦۖ وَٱعۡفُ عَنَّا وَٱغۡفِرۡ لَنَا وَٱرۡحَمۡنَآۚ أَنتَ مَوۡلَٮٰنَا فَٱنصُرۡنَا عَلَى ٱلۡقَوۡمِ ٱلۡڪَـٰفِرِينَ (٢٨٦)

Allah burdens no soul save to its capacity;
standing to its account is what it has earned,
and against its account is what it has earned.
Our Lord, take us not to task
if we forget, or make mistake.
Our Lord, burden us not with a load
such as You did lay upon those before us.
Our Lord, lay us not with a burden
beyond what we have the strength to bear.
And pardon us, and forgive us,
and have mercy on us.
You are our Protector;
Help us against the people who stand against Faith.  Ameen!

Michael Jackson 1958-2009

Michael Jackson at his best. Truly mesmerising. Take No Prisoner attitude and timed perfection, a pro at his best doing what he is truly great at - entertaining the world.

I was thinking very hard about Michael Jackson ever since news of his passing hits me. I wasn't intent on writing about him on my blog as quite simply, I thought he or any other pop stars would and should  not affect me anymore.  He was a product of my pre-pubescent years, and I remembered in primary five (1983) when I was astounded to learn that the voice on the radio singing Beat It was that of a man, a man whom I later learn to Michael Jackson.

Part of the reason of the sense of detachment over his death, I guess was that you 'out-grew' your pop stars once you hit your mid 30s, they (pop starts, et all) no longer become the moral, style, wardrobe compass or any compass at all. All I ever did was to get his Essential CD Collection and last I heard his songs was on a road trip to Malaysia.  So I tried to detach, delete and move on. I believe the loss would be more terribly felt by the 30 somethings who never outgrew Michael and those of who idolise him would be the rightful ones to  mourn over  his death. The last 'mourning period' that I went through for someone not from my family was over Princess Diana's death. That took me a while to shake it off, and even till now when I hear Elton John's rendition of 'Candle in the Wind' I go queasy so I knew that I need to stay away from thinking about Micheal's death. It was easy as not  listening to his music for some time and the lack of news from him, made it possible for me to get his death out of my system until...

Days after his death, news on TV, footages of young, black and white Jackson came on, Fir and Dada started  asking me more about Michael Jackson. They asked me why was he great? What I knew about him? and was he like Justin Timberlake?.

I was going like 'What? How can anyone compare the dance maestro to Timberlake? You mean you guys never seen Michael sing or dance before?' , I retorted. And then reality sank in,  that is when I realise that Micheal's music had stopped playing for a while and a whole generation grew up not knowing who he was.

This is a story that happened in 1987.

 I was in Class 3G in an all boys school and it was the time of the year when most of us knew that a mega event was about to happen. Michael Jackson’s BAD Album has just been sold off the shelves in music stores in Singapore the day before. I went to school that day not thinking that it would be a memorable day. During the second period, the boys in my class was hushing and whispering to each other. A friend of mine  (forgotten his name) has just gotten hold of the tape. We were supposed to have listening comprehension exercise, and we were supposed to go to the language lab for listening comprehension when the second period ends. Our English teacher, a strict no nonsense lady would be waiting for us at the door to the lab and we better hurry and walk in an orderly fashion to avoid her wrath. 

Language labs in those days were specially built rooms with cubicles and every student would be sitting in one with a headphone over his ears. The idea was to learn language through listening. It was a technique that was quite popular in those days and I believed it has something to do with phonics. But in, reality it was quite funny as at times the voices we hear in our headphones had a funny accent and you could hear some of the boys imitating the twang and pronouncing them loudly in their cubicles. It was hilarious,  as at times we had to listen to English dialogue from a British, American as well as an Australian speaker and recite it afterward and strive for diction, enunciation and clarity. Oh boy, those were the days.!

Anyway we made our way to the language labs and we were running late as there was now excitement in the air and we were all wanting to get a view of BAD’s album cover. In doing so, we caused quite a bit of commotion. Not only were we late, and had our teacher waiting, but we knew our friend was in deep, deep trouble as Miss Kaur had spotted the tape as it was being passed from one boy to the other. I felt sad for the person who brought the tape to school as such items were considered ‘contraband’ in those days and would be confiscated by any teacher.

The teacher was a young, pretty, energetic Punjabi lady and we could all see the frustration and grimace on her face as she held the tape in her hands. We all figured out that she would confiscate the tape straightaway. But guess what? That did not happen!

What did happen was quite the opposite. She told the class that she would do something different. It was going to extra special. She closed the door of the language lab, told us all to proceed to our cubicles and she inserted the tape into the master console. It was from that point onwards that we had  twenty minutes of audio  ecstasy, for all 40 of us,  boys from 3G in Gan Eng Seng School in 1987 never knew what had made our teacher play that tape and we all heard Michael Jackson that day. For some it was their first experience listening to him. For me my first was in 1984, when Beat It came on air. On that day, we listened to BAD, Man in the Mirror, The Way You make me feel and Dirty Diana among others.

However the one that I liked most that day and the one I like till today from Michael Jackson is none other than Smooth Criminal. It was the chorus, and straining the ears trying to figure out what he was singing that ‘took me off my seat’. You bet, my listening skills were on overdrive mode that day. It was also the groovy, guttural, bass rock that one hears in the opening sequence that drew me to the song. By the end of the song, I was visibly palpitating, my heart pounded heavily and I heaved a 'whoo whooo' once the song ended.

Who would guess that we would  hear Michael Jackson in our school that day? And who would believe that Miss Kaur our strict English teacher would be our friend in crime? But more importantly, who would believe that on that day Michael Jackson became our idol.? From that day onwards whenever I need a perk me up song, it would be Smooth Criminal. The funny thing from all of this, is that Miss Kaur was never able to quite become the strict teacher that she once was. She became our cool, Michael loving teacher, and we all knew that he had a great, cool teacher. Often when we passed her, we could now see her smile and the twinkle in her eye, says it all. We loved her dearly.

Smooth Criminal became more than just a song to me and some of my buds. This was an anthem that rouses body and soul and if you had seen the music video , if you had seen Michael in his ‘take no prisoner dance moves’ you would not disagree with me.

This was the song of the 80s that has tremendous impact on most of us, male late 30 something Singaporeans today. For Michael was truly great the time I heard him in 87 and now. I wish that he found the peace that he has always been seeking for in his life. Thank You sincerely for all the memories. The beat is still in all of us who listened to you that day till  the rest of our lives. Thank You also to Miss Kaur and to my friend who bought the tape that day!

To my teenage idol, Michael Jackson, as how your brother Jermaine had said on CNN 'May Allah be with you all the time'. Inna illa wa inna illa Ro jiuin'. You may be forgotten, but the beat lives on in all of us. Thank You.!

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Being cute has neve been so difficult

9:35 PM Wednesday, September 19, 2007 19092007979

ok la... but with Thomas the train it helps

What a weekend.

I watched 12 episodes of Prison Break 2 on Sat. Slept @ 4. Went hari raya jalan-jalan with Faiz and kids on both Sat and Sun. Twas a good weekend. Still have a few more houses to visit, esp those in the East.

Back Again...

Last month was indeed a challenging one. Fasting month, coping with sec 4&5 prelim markings, revision sec3,moving house,unpacking and relocating stuff from parents place. At the same time, the spiritual aspect of ramadhan, does make it look extreme. But it is in this hurly burly of things, that Aidil Fitri means a lot to me. Rejoice and share with loved ones what we have. And of course with our new place up and running, we are indeed blessed and fortunate for all that God have given us.I hope to post pics of our new place soon. Also to all muslim readers, to have a  wonderful Aidil Fitri with those whom you love.